Love Hurts - God Heals part 2

Have you ever poured out your heart and soul into a friendship with someone and they betrayed you? Or maybe they just weren't there for you when you really needed it? It makes you feel so hurt and sad. Maybe angry too. You question why you wasted so much time and energy on someone that proved to be so unworthy. Sometimes this makes you hesitant about befriending other people in the future. At least it's been that way for me. It seems like the past few years have seen a few of these situations in my family and it hurts like heck. I keep hoping there will be some sort of reconciliation and healing change. But it just hasn't happened (yet?). Perhaps it never will. So, I mourn the passing of friendships.

I have been thinking lately about these types of things. And I think I have concluded this: I don't think love is ever wasted, even if it's not appreciated or reciprocated. I think when we stand before the Lord at judgment, we'll have been relieved to say that we loved lavishly even if our hearts are broken to shreds. After all, that's what He did. And then we should just keep on loving and doing our best to be an open-hearted person.

The thing is, sometimes with some people, you have to love them from afar. We can be like the father in the story of the Prodigal Son. He was already looking down the road when his estranged son was coming home. We can determine from that, he had been looking for, hoping and anticipating his son's return. I believe we should have a heart that is open, welcoming and ready for reconciliation. The other person has to be on that same road as well. It has to be mutual. Just as the father was looking for the son, the son was ready to leave his "wild living" and return home. The son couldn't have it both ways at his home. He had to leave the destructive behaviour behind to enjoy the full benefits of a close relationship. Until that time, the father had his eyes on the horizon and a heart that seemed to be free of anger, accusations, and all the other things he probably felt over his child living wild and wasting his inheritance. He was ready when his child was ready, not with a lecture, but with open arms.

That's the lesson for me. Don't get hung up on bitter feelings over everything that has passed. Let it go and be healed and free from it. Be ready for restoration of the relationship, if and when it comes. In the mean time L-O-V-E from afar, as opposed to stewing or wallowing!




Image from Barry's Clip Art.

Thanksgiving, Reduced

Some years are different, some years are transitional. I'm not sure what this year will be when I view it retrospectively, but I'm guessing it will be more like a year of evolution for me and my family. And that can be a very good thing, even though it feels a bit strange right now.

This is the first year that Big Daddy and I will not be with either of our parents, and some blending of one or both of our extended families. That just seems odd. We were supposed to be cooking and serving about 4 turkeys our church donated to our local homeless mission. The good news is that they had more than enough people volunteer to serve! So, they don't need us to serve, only cook.

Not being needed to help serve to a large group for a large part of the day sort of unsettled our plans. We thought we'd be occupied and busy one way. We are used to big Thanksgiving Dinners, I don't think we have ever had a small one, but this year that is what we will do at home with our children. It actually seems very nice and relaxed so far.

Whomever we are with and wherever we are we have much to be thankful for. I am chiefly thankful for the peace and freedom I found in Christ, that I found no where else (and heaven knows I looked enough places for it!). I have to mention that because it is the foundation from where all other blessings flow. I am grateful to God for the myriad of other blessings, chief among them my beloved family. I will be missing the family members I won't get to see.


photo by Koen Muurling
Happy Thanksgiving to everyone who stops by here!Not sure if anyone still does, but sending good wishes if you do happen, perchance, by my obscure corner of the blog-o-sphere. :)

A "Secret" Site

I sometimes enjoy the Post Secret Site. Be forewarned that a few of the secrets and the corresponding postcard art can be disturbing and have adult themes. However, more often than not, they can be variously artistic, thoughtful, funny and real. The picture below is from that site.


from PostSecret

Do you have a secret you wish you could unburden yourself of? I have a few. I have poured some of them out before the Lord in prayer and that has helped more than sending them anonymously to an artistic stranger. Still, the idea behind PostSecret is compelling and many of the postcards are exquisite little works of art.

Art

little nurse shark
(c)M.d.V.2009
Delighted
to see this creature
unafraid

Pet Peeve - Spelling Names Correctly

Why is it that my cyber-pals can spell my name right, but relatives whom I've known for AGES cannot? One particular relative, consistently misspells some of our names. However, my online friends seem to be able to remember a correct spelling. I would think not having met someone in person would make it more difficult to keep details straight. Some of the people who have broken bread with us countless times, and were with us through the births and baby dedications cannot seem to remember a few letters. There are times when the name is posted over social networking sites, and they can't even get it right when it's written elsewhere on the same computer screen "page." It's a pet peeve.

If someone is only casually acquainted with us, I can understand, but when someone has known you for decades and your children since before birth, well, I think it's rude to misspell. Am I being too hard? Am I being petty? Does this bother anyone else? It's a pet peeve. Winnie the Pooh would say, "A little bothering thing." Like a yapping chihuahua.


photo byby wcmcwi

Art

This is something whimsical~


(c)M.d.V.2009

Yummy Food: Rice Pudding

I have been really, really enjoying rice pudding by Kozy Shack lately. Besides being a yummy comfort food, and giving me a little calcium, it has another favorable quality. No one else in my house likes it. That means it's always there waiting for me when I crave it, rather than being consumed by the kiddos. It really harsh-es my mellow when I am looking forward to a little treat and I find that someone else ate it all up! We have that problem in our house. That is part of the reason why I switched from milk to dark chocolate. My family doesn't like it as much as I do, add that to the great antioxidants and you have my reason for switching. Even so, if the kids find my stash of dark chocolate they are apt to eat it, or at least one of them is! They have not done this with the rice pudding. Therefore, my rice pudding kick is all the more enjoyable. Don't judge me until you have a home full of candy craving addicts. I have really worked hard to surrender my will, and by God's grace and help, I am able to moderate and eat a little of a square or two of chocolate from a larger bar at a time. It's usually only one week a month that I find myself craving it, if you catch my drift. It is a complete BUMMER when someone has found it and devoured it!

Art

(c)M.d.V.2009


I was thinking of artist Peter Max when I did this one. What can I say? It makes me feel happy.

Hell Is Hot And Time Is Short

I have heard my Father-in-Law, a wonderful pastor and all around good Christian man, say it this way, "There is a heaven to gain and a hell to shun." I was reminded of these sentiments while reading a good post over at MMI (Monday Morning Insight). It was a good reminder about keeping ministry-related things in proper perspective. Too many times we get focused on things that don't really matter when measured in regards to eternity. Simply following Jesus and pointing others in His direction by our deeds and words is what I try to do. I try not to let the less important things like church decor and worship music style become a distraction. Though I certainly think I would love to have music like this, this, or this at the local church. It's surprising how many church people squabble over things such as worship music style and carpet color. Any pastor can tell you that some people are fickle and will leave a church if they don't like the music, or the new pew upholstery. It's surprising how many of us (myself included) let these kind of small things cause rifts or simply personal distraction within the body of Christ. I made it click-able to explain because it's a churchy term and some folks who aren't familiar with church-speak might stop by. Anyway, the church is supposed to be a good force on this earth and sadly sometimes we can't get it together enough because we stay focused on stuff that won't last or make a difference in the long run.

You like the smell of what???

"Diapers," said celebrity actress Sarah Jessica Parker, "I even like when they’re wet and you smell them all warm liked a baked good." Ummm. OK. That's what it said in my Miami Herald this morning. I could type so many things, but I won't. Just let it sink in. She likes the smell of diapers. She compares them to warm baked goods. For me baked goods conjures up images and scent memories of hot from the oven cookies, cakes, muffins. Simply thinking about them in the same sentence as freshly soiled warm diapers makes me gag.
photo byBrianfit

I work at a preschool. I have had three babies, and watched and cared for several babies for friends and family, some for a stretch of time. I have probably changed a thousand diapers. I love the mothering profession and its various aspects. But never ever have I relished the smell of a pee-soaked or muddy diaper.

I don't think I would appreciate Ms. Parker's fragrance line. I don't think we have the same errr, taste.

Chalk this up as another perplexing celebrity speak, or things that make you go hmmm. Something akin to Kanye being a proud non-reader while touting his newly released book.

So with all the important things going on in the world, that's what caught my eye today. Sick, I know.

100th Post

So I want to write something witty and eloquent, for this my 100th post but find it all escapes me. I am just me, and not witty and only rarely eloquent. So this is it.
My 100th post.
Yippee!
Since I began this blog, and began my Artist's Way journal I have felt a relief and release. I have to give credit to God, because this has been a spiritual journey, and praying and reading His Word has been a huge part of my creative breakthrough. And I still have a long way to go.

Even though I haven't been doing my Artist's Way religiously, I have been taking some of the principals I learned from the book and they have helped. What I have been doing "religiously" is the yearly bible reading plan. I have been making time for myself to sketch and pray and give all the old, painful hurts and emotions over to God and with His grace and help, not continuing to nurse or wallow in them.




And now for something completely different....





He is my bob.
I say this (He is my bob) to myself about 5 times a day now. And when I do, I see a picture of a stick figure man with a smile on his face, in a field of flowers, with a sunny blue sky and birds flying over his head. "He is my bob" is written underneath the picture. It is a picture my 6-year-old Calvin drew, and it is of Big Daddy. It makes me happy in a way that I will try to describe. It took me two days, of looking at it on the fridge where Calvin proudly posted it, to realize that what Calvin meant is "He is my dad." I know that Kindergarten aged kids reverse letters and numbers often, and it shouldn't have taken me that long to figure it out. When you look closely at the "o" in Calvin's "bob" it's an "a" also written backwards. Thinking of this picture makes me happy because it perfectly illustrates a child's sweet, innocent love and faith in his dad. The little "mistake" isn't so much a mistake as a translation problem when viewed through the reality of Calvin's age, ability and understanding. Calvin has complete trust, love and admiration for his dad. Not even reversing the letters can change that. There is a universal truth, and it comes shinning through if you just pause to look at that simple, colorful and beautiful picture and it's words for a few minutes. I missed it for a couple of days, but I finally got it, and I thank my Heavenly Dad for that. So when I say "he is my bob" to myself, and it makes me grin. It's an inside joke and a calming meditation I do with myself to remind me of how good it is to be a child who has a Daddy that loves them, and I mean that on several levels. I am grateful for the father of my children. I am grateful for the father I had. And I am most grateful to my Heavenly Father.



Some of the things children say and do give me much amusement and joy. Sometimes I think I have the best job in the world. Today one of my 4-year-old students said, "Ms. e.b., we're going to my Mom's ammy!" I said, "Do you mean, Miami?" "No," she said, "It's My Mom's Ammy!" This same student informed me that I am no longer a princess when I wear sneakers to work instead of my usual sandals.

LOST

I love it. Currently my favorite show. I was blown away by last season's episodes, especially the last three, and realizing back then I wasn't going to have anymore Lost until 2010 had me jonesing! I so wanted to do the Lost re-watch this summer that I read about last spring on Nikki Stafford's interesting blog about her favorite TV shows.

My re-watch plan was foiled by a few factors. My local video rental store has only seasons 2, 3, 4 and possibly 5 (can't remember). In Central Florida, our previous home, that wouldn't have been a big deal, because there would have been about 10 other rental places and libraries I could have gone to. Now that we live on an island and in a small town, there aren't many other options.

Big Daddy missed my various hints at wanting season 1 on DVD as a gift, for any gift-giving occasion the spring and summer held. Since our finances ultra-tight, I couldn't allow myself to just get it without having a reason. He did surprise me with it for my birthday in October! By then I was so busy and distracted by everything else (hey-I'm a mom of 3 and a new pre-school teacher!), I had forgotten, and it was really a nice surprise! I still haven't began a re-watch yet, and I'm not sure if by now I/we could squeeze in watching all the previous seasons episodes before the new and final season begins in "early 2010."

Anybody else out there want to do a a re-watch with me, beginning sometime soon?


Check out Jorge Garcia's blog here. He plays the character Hurley- he's one of our favorites on Lost and he's got a fine blog over there.

More funny stuff

There is an online site for artisans and craft people to sell their handmade wares and it is called Etsy. There are a lot of cool, wonderfully weird, and beautiful things to be found there. However, like so many good things in this world, there is a dark, down side to etsy, as well. Apparently someone has discovered all the bad things in etsy-world and placed them on a nifty, snarky website all their own, hilariously titled regretesy. You know my fondness for such sites, I mean how many times have I mentioned cakewrecks? Not to mention fail, awkward family photos, what not to crochet... I find them all hilarious. So I couldn't help but take a gander around regretsy. And then I saw this, then I READ the description, which is the best part. I did LOL. They have got to be kidding!

The h1n1 hoopla

Our public school is trying to vaccinate all of the students with the new h1n1 shot, but we are opting out. I don't believe the vaccine has been out long enough to be durably and reliably tested. I have concerns that there is mercury in some of the vaccines, and that there is controversy over the nasal vaccine they offer to children. All my children are in the recommended age bracket, so I have not come to this conclusion lightly. I work in a pre-school germ factory and we have had one confirmed case so far, and likely some unconfirmed cases. It's not an easy decision. But right now, it seems like the best decision for our family with consideration to our circumstances and all I have looked into for now.

More Hodgepodge - Humor

These made me smile.
Funny Christmas:






Funny Halloween story here.

One of my all-time favorite comedy sketches. This never ceases to literally make me laugh out loud, still after all these years.

I found another funny site for Christian parody, The Sacred Sandwich, see also Lark News and The Holy Observer. Fun, fun, funny.