Out of the mouths of babes...

So, just as I was thinking to myself last week, this Master Cleanse fast does really make my skin look and feel better, I was hit with an honest opinion from an outside source. Calvin, my youngest child was playing with the other neighborhood boys - a group of them ranging in age from 5-9. I called down to Calvin to ask him a question and he answered me, naturally addressing me as "Mom." To which one of the boys started laughing and said, “Mom? I thought she was your grandma!” So I rather think the fast has made me delirious from lack of food, and my earlier assessment of my skin was, ummm, unreliable. Edited to add: This also points to another facet of US culture. The age range of motherhood. I think Calvin’s friend’s mother was in her late teens or early 20’s when she had him. I was 35 when I had Calvin, so I am indeed closer to the age of the child’s grandmother than his mother.

The first book I've read this year is....

From Touching Rock Bottom To Touching The Nations by Nick Park. It's an interesting and encouraging account of how a young, alcoholic, inhalant-addicted punk from Ireland and England turned his life around through faith. I read it with great interest because I love biographies and stories of transformation and redemption (see Keith Green’s No Compromise and Brian “Head” Welch’s Save Me From Myself). Secondly, my interest was piqued by my husband, known fondly here as Big Daddy, having heard Nick Park speak at a Men’s Conference. He enjoyed Nick Park’s message at the conference immensely! We could both relate somewhat by having been teenage punks ourselves and all that went with it - partying, brawling, and varying degrees having a malcontented attitude with our lives. And then eventually with substance abuse issues. The book chronicles Nick Park’s life and transformation, and the many challenges he faced and overcame, both before and after his sobriety and spiritual change. From rubbing elbows with Sid Vicious to dedicating the babies of Nigerian refugees - it is an interesting chronicle! I recommend this book.

I'm also reading through the bible again this year, along with our denominational initiative, although I have opted to use the LifeJournal reading plan from YouVersion, found here.

Random New Year Ramble

"Outside of a dog a book is man's best friend, inside of a dog it's too dark to read."

Groucho Marx said that. Yesterday I asked my Siri to search the web for a book, and "she" quoted that. It made me laugh. I am on a modified version of the Master Cleanse Fast (you can google if you're curious). Big Daddy and I try to do some sort of special fasting and prayer at the onset of the new year, as an act of reverence toward God. It's a time of sober reflection, thankfulness, and seeking His will and direction for the new year. I find today difficult, but yesterday was not. I was awash with inspiration and ideas yesterday. Today I feel sluggish and have a headache (caffeine withdrawal, I suspect) and I am distracted by the macaroni and cheese the kids had for lunch. But it's just today, and a little challenge, and it will pass and I am sure tomorrow will be better.

Welcome 2013, A Rebooted Greeting

It's been a long time. I can't promise a successful or consistent reboot, but for today, I am here. Happy New Year. I sit here with a heart that is happy with the promise a new year brings. A fresh start and clean slate is always a nice and welcoming thing, like a newly sharpened pencil and an empty drawing pad. So, I am resolute with myself to continue and build upon some good things and healthier and better choices. For today, I'm involved with a bit of praying and fasting, listening to some wonderful classical music and I feel like the windows of my soul are letting in a welcome breeze that is fresh with hope and contentment. I can't quite write that, though, without saying my heart goes out to those who are unable to muster such hope right now, and my prayers are with and for them. So, to anyone who is still lurking about, this is the place where I chronicle my spiritual and artistic journey as one, little and rather low-key person. I am not a spectacular writer or artist, or incredibly witty or erudite, but I am sincere, honest and opinionated. And I like to write and draw.

“Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow: The year is going, let him go; Ring out the false, ring in the true.”
-Alfred, Lord Tennyson

Real Mom

Now that is a cute and funny photo, but it got me thinking of a subject that is very close and important to my heart: Adoption. I would also like to take this opportunity to remind you that November is National Adoption month, with National Adoption Day falling on November 19th, see here.

I always bristle a little at the term "real mom" and I will explain why. I am adopted, and when many people find that out, they ask me if I know my real mom. Once in a while they say "real parents" but 97% of the time it's the mom they're the most curious about. It's natural to be curious and I know that people mean no disrespect when they say "real" parent. Here is how my reply goes:

Well, I actually consider the parents that raised me to be my "real parents" because they are the ones that were there every day of my life for all the colds and fevers, scraped knees, school plays, graduations, etc. If you mean do I know my biological parents, the answer is no. Though I do have a HUGE amount of affection and respect for them and their unselfish decision to give me up for adoption, I have never met them.

My parents had a very organic approach to the disclosure of adoption, and I simply recall always knowing I was adopted, it was never revealed to me at a certain age or anything like that. One of the dearest people in my life, my first babysitter Nan* says that my parents had these adoption storybooks, and when she'd babysit me, she'd read them and cry because it was so touching. I vaguely remember those books. My parents tried for children for about 10 years thorough various biological and medical means, and then the lengthy adoption process, so they were elated when they finally were able to adopt me and then my little brother.

Lately my two younger children, Calvin* (age 8) and Flora* (age 12) have been asking questions about my real mom. After doing my real mom spiel two times, I had a little epiphany and used Our Boy* that darn dog that they love so much. (The above picture reminded me of all this.) I asked Calvin and Flora, "Who is OurBoy's real family? Is it your old friend Sarah who's pet dog had the litter OurBoy came from? Or is it us, who adopted him when he was a little puppy and have been with him, taking care of him ever since? This drove the point of adoption home for them and helped them understand the distinction between biological and adoptive and what is "real." I mean to say that both are "real" but I believe it is important to make that distinction and give each kind of parent, both biological and adoptive, the proper respect and position within the life of the adoptee. Being a parent takes a great amount of unselfish love, I am blessed to say that I have experienced that kind love in some very special ways, through the woman who decided to give me up, and through the parents who took me in. Both kinds of parents are real. Whomever fulfilled the role of parent, in the day to day, year to year, decade to decade reality of life, well, to me that is actual and real in a way that makes biology, with all due respect, a smaller part of the equation in my life. I wouldn't be here, or be the person I have become without the decisions my adoptive and my biological parents made and the roles they fulfilled in my life. One is not more important than the other. You can't take out of the equation the huge, intensely personal decision my biological mother/parents made at the beginning of my life, nor the lifetime of care and parenting my adoptive parents undertook. I understand that there are different adoption experiences, which make this more of a complicated subject for many, I can only speak for myself.

Autumn Playlist Revisited

I'm in a mood for the music that for one reason or another reminds me of the Autumn season. This is something began compiling several years back, and added some and deleted some. What songs remind you of the Fall season? Why? Feel free to share as many or as few details as you like but definitely share the song and artist names so we can check them out.

Funny Friday

This is silly. I didn't LOL but I smiled real big and almost snickered a few times.