Have you ever poured out your heart and soul into a friendship with someone and they betrayed you? Or maybe they just weren't there for you when you really needed it? It makes you feel so hurt and sad. Maybe angry too. You question why you wasted so much time and energy on someone that proved to be so unworthy. Sometimes this makes you hesitant about befriending other people in the future. At least it's been that way for me. It seems like the past few years have seen a few of these situations in my family and it hurts like heck. I keep hoping there will be some sort of reconciliation and healing change. But it just hasn't happened (yet?). Perhaps it never will. So, I mourn the passing of friendships.
I have been thinking lately about these types of things. And I think I have concluded this: I don't think love is ever wasted, even if it's not appreciated or reciprocated. I think when we stand before the Lord at judgment, we'll have been relieved to say that we loved lavishly even if our hearts are broken to shreds. After all, that's what He did. And then we should just keep on loving and doing our best to be an open-hearted person.
The thing is, sometimes with some people, you have to love them from afar. We can be like the father in the story of the Prodigal Son. He was already looking down the road when his estranged son was coming home. We can determine from that, he had been looking for, hoping and anticipating his son's return. I believe we should have a heart that is open, welcoming and ready for reconciliation. The other person has to be on that same road as well. It has to be mutual. Just as the father was looking for the son, the son was ready to leave his "wild living" and return home. The son couldn't have it both ways at his home. He had to leave the destructive behaviour behind to enjoy the full benefits of a close relationship. Until that time, the father had his eyes on the horizon and a heart that seemed to be free of anger, accusations, and all the other things he probably felt over his child living wild and wasting his inheritance. He was ready when his child was ready, not with a lecture, but with open arms.
That's the lesson for me. Don't get hung up on bitter feelings over everything that has passed. Let it go and be healed and free from it. Be ready for restoration of the relationship, if and when it comes. In the mean time L-O-V-E from afar, as opposed to stewing or wallowing!
Image from Barry's Clip Art.
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