Turning the Other Cheek

I read this post on a blog today. Please check it out, for my post here to make sense. I wanted to post a comment over there but I hesitated about what to write. I wanted to show the right amount of encouragement, understanding and compassion, because it struck a cord with me personally. First, let me say I was never punched in the face like that. I was verbally abused and insulted by a person in my neighborhood. My oldest was about 7 and had been riding his bike around the block. He was chased by a large dog. It scared him but he wasn’t hurt. I put my toddler daughter in the stroller and had my son show me where it happened. I walked frequently throughout our neighborhood and I never saw any dogs that worried me, but there were a few in fenced in yards. I wanted to let the owner know their dog was loose. As I approached the house my son showed me, this woman came from the front porch, she was talking on the phone, but stopped and yelled at me, “Get your fat [expletive] home, I told your kid the dog wouldn’t hurt him!” I remember being stunned, since it had been a really long time since I was cussed out by someone face to face like that. Probably not since I was a teen. When this happened to me I was a minister’s wife, and a stay-at-home-mom, so I had not been around such crass behaviour in a long time. Now, I worked as a bartender and a waitress many years before that, so I have witnessed similar behavior before, just so you know, but when this happened I was quite insulated in my own little world, and it sure jarred me out of it! I was shocked for an instant. The next second I even felt like crying, which quickly passed. Then I was seething, literally, with anger. I could feel the adrenaline coursing through me. I wanted, in the flesh, to chew her up and spit her out and tell how low I thought she was. Instead I said something like, “Ma’am I wasn’t sure if you knew your dog was loose, and it did scare my son and I thought you should know.” It took every ounce of self-control I could muster to keep myself in check as I turned around and we walked home. I felt so humiliated and hurt. And angry, of course, very angry. In front my of my children! This woman cussed and insulted me in front of their innocent ears. I don’t think they ever saw adults acting that way before that. Whoever made up the “sticks and stones” chant many of us know from childhood was wrong. Calling people names can and does hurt. I knew my son was watching my response and I knew he was also upset and angry. When we were home I explained to him, because we’re Christians, we must never lash out in anger against someone who has lashed out at us. This was a prime example of Jesus’ teaching on turning the other cheek. Like Christian-the-blogger wrote in his piece, I was also compelled to feel pity for this person. How sad her first instinct was not to care for a fellow human, a child, or to engage in kind of peaceful discussion, but to lash out hatefully. Instead of being responsible and considerate in her little corner of the world she acted maliciously. People who are that miserable and hateful are to be pitied. So, I was able to use this situation to teach and reinforce some good virtues, that surely would have been lost if he witnessed his mom in a screaming match or cat-fight. I knew my son was upset, but he seemed to understand my explanation and accept it. A few years later when I was teaching a youth class at church, which my son happened to be in, I was able to use this as an example to them of how important it is to react peacefully, as Jesus would, rather than repay an insult for an insult. I think he understood it all better then. My heart goes out to Christian-the-blogger, I can imagine that a punch would have amplified my feelings, and I commend him for keeping a level head and a Christ-like attitude. It’s very difficult, but essential for a anyone who calls themselves a Christian to not repay evil for evil. I think God allows these things to happen to us so that we can see exactly where we are in of faith-walk with Him, and also to know what it’s like to suffer, as Jesus did. This helps us to understand the depth of what He did when He suffered and died for us, and it helps us to be compassionate to others who have suffered, because we know what it’s like.